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Malema loses his pleasure palace

Andrew Donaldson on SARS' auctioning off the economic freedom fighter's luxury pile-in-progress

MUCH chatter at the Mahogany Ridge concerning the sale of the luxury pile-in-progress belonging to Julius Malema, the economic freedom fighter and gentleman farmer currently in a spot of bother with the tax man.

Admittedly, we know little about Norman Tloubatla, the 44-year-old businessman who bought the half-finished Sandown mansion for R5.9 million at Thursday's auction other than that he is the chief executive of a company that makes road signs and that he paid way, way too much for the place, which was expected to be knocked down for between R4m and R4.5m.

Was it recklessness, or did Tloublatla intend going large with the attention-seeking extravagance that is customary with the arriviste classes? He does, after all, drive a Porsche Panamera, a vehicle suggestive of exaggerated self-importance. Or perhaps, more intriguingly, be bought the place on behalf of a third party, and with their money? Who can say?

There were reports that, like Malema, Tloubatla was also from Seshego, in Limpopo, and that the two had known each other since childhood. Malema has, however, firmly stated that he has "no dealings with the buyer of the house in Sandown, and have no business, personal, or political association with him." Tloubatla, meanwhile, refused to speak to reporters at the auction.

No matter. With time all will be revealed. But until then we can pore over the building plans and speculate on the life Jelly Tsotsi envisaged amid the titz and glitz of Jozi's northern suburbs.

The mansion was not only to have a cinema, but also an "entertainment room". What they really mean is "night club". The former ANC Youth League leader believes he is something a deejay and, in the past, has had scores of his closest friends over to watch to him play records. Perhaps the new occupants will be more considerate and also invite the neighbours rather than have the bodyguards assault them when they complain about the noise.

There were plans for a wine cellar, a cigar lounge, a coffee bar and a strong room - the latter probably for the safekeeping of family trust deposits and petty cash for taxi rides.

In addition to the run-of-the-mill double garage, there was also to be a "showroom garage". I'm led to believe this is a necessity. There are times when one has to impress friends and reporters with new acquisitions to the fleet. What better way than having part of the home pimped up to resemble a motor dealership?

There are other considerations which make the "showroom garage" a must. Although Top Billing, the SABC3 lifestyle show for the vulgar and fabulously stupid, has yet to do something on this, I have learnt that Japanese cuisine is something of a hit with these people and that dinner parties where guests are driven to a sexual frenzy by dining off starving models draped over Ferraris and Maseratis clad in little more than bits of fish are all the rage. Call it hard car porn. (And if you thought that was terrible, consider what the German cowboy said to his brand new set of wheels: "Audi.")

The one room, however, that really caught our attention was labelled simply "study". Yes. A study. In a Malema home.  

This was unthinkable - or at least it was until one of the younger Ridge regulars pointed out that, thanks to progressive education policies, the study has been liberated from historical notions of erudition. Freed of such oppressive, colonial constraints, this "space" has been thrown open, if not to the masses, then certainly their leaders, and was now a place where the modern economic freedom fighter sought refuge from the hurly burly, not in the plummy pages of leather-bound first editions, but rather the giddy fizz of computer games.

But what of the man himself? Jelly has declared he will comment on his tax bill "at the appropriate moment, which will not be later than July 2013".

He was, however, more forthcoming earlier in the week with regard to Guptagate, and the "illegal and treacherous" landing of a chartered jet at the Waterkloof airbase.

"Since that incident," he thundered, "everyone, including the media, analysts, union leaders, government Ministers have been egg-walking around the problem and therefore failing to expose and speak to the reason why South Africa's security was undermined. As considerate and fearless South Africans, it is now the moment once again to speak truth and expose what many people are scared to say. As youth, we carry an obligation to speak truth at all times, and we will never claim easy victories."

Shame, he lost his pleasure palace this week. No victory will ever be easy at such times.

This article first appeared in the Weekend Argus.

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