10. The ANC sells luxury leather jackets
The ANC's website this week advertised a range of discrete and stylish leather clothing, at very reasonable prices. For some inexplicable reason the M&G's Chris Roper described the jackets as "awful, ugly", and "disgusting" and complained that they made his eyes bleed. Clearly, the man has no taste - and is a colour-blind racist to boot.
9. Joburg's world class African potholes
The ratepayers of Johannesburg tend to be in a particularly grumpy mood in January. Many of them have just returned from far flung foreign lands - like Germany or Cape Town - where the streets are unholy and clean. In this context it is inadvisable to write to Business Day, as city spokesperson Gabu Tugwana did, trumpeting Amos Masondo's record as mayor of "Africa's richest city."
This letter provoked a torrent of replies from disgruntled residents of the northern suburbs. D Wolpert explained how on a 12km drive from Morningside to Fourways he had counted the following: "Of 11 traffic lights, five were working. There were nine large potholes and many smaller ones - at least three were, in my opinion, dangerous. There were two major water leaks on this route. The filth and rubbish that polluted this short stretch of road was disgusting."
John Kane Bermann complained that "Bits of streets and pavements are dug up for some or other purpose, poorly cordoned-off with tatty ribbons, and then left as hazardous and gaping wounds full of rotting garbage and filthy water for months on end. That Masondo and Co should wish to attract hordes of soccer fans later in the year to see this mess suggests that they are blind to it or could not care less about it."