A FAMOUS GROUSE
MUCH excitement in the world of fact-free journalism as the genre goes super-nova, blasting off for the darkest corners of the media universe on a voyage into the boundless realms of deranged fantasy.
Strapping themselves in for a wild ride, Independent Media and IOL launched their Unmasking Project at a press briefing in Cape Town on Monday. This, we learnt, is a campaign aimed at exposing networks that have been “working to undermine the country's hard-fought democracy”.
To this end, they will “lift the lid’ on the coordinated attacks and broadsides disinformation and misinformation intended to “swing public opinion and deflect attention” from important matters regarding the national interest. ___STEADY_PAYWALL___
More importantly, and according to Sifiso Mahlangu, editor of The Star and the host of this live-streamed briefing, a principal shadowy big-wig would be revealed at this gathering.
And so one was — the ANC stalwart Lindiwe Sisulu.
Strange, but true. Sisulu was at the briefing, resplendent in a bright fuchsia two-piece but radiating dark resentment all the same. Through some mysterious mojo, she was somehow coaxed into revealing that, as intelligence minister, a job she held from 2001 and 2004, her department had spied on the entire South African fourth estate. As she admitted:
“I was the first minister of intelligence in this country… So we were responsible for ensuring that the integrity of information, of individual’s information, is dealt with. We had very regular meetings with the media and we ourselves were exposed to a lot of information — we bugged everybody, basically.
“But there was an essential element in everybody who worked in intelligence — ‘what they know, they cannot repeat.’ And even if a journalist were to get to them, they were not allowed to. We had this ethical basis in intelligence to make sure we can drive a society that is based on ethics.”
While the Presidency has effectively dismissed Sisulu’s claims about spying on every journalist in the country, Derek Hanekom, former minister and member of the ANC’s national executive, has tweeted that she has “effectively admitted to breaking the law”.
What’s more, there are some big unanswered questions here. Who were the journalists at these regular meetings with the media? Can ANC spooks have an ethical basis and “drive a society based on ethics”? Does Sisulu ever think before making a noise with her face?
She of course was not the intended target of this bizarre Unmasking Project, merely the collateral damage as Independent Media shot itself in the foot with this nonsense.
The primary objective of this circus, attended by the ringmaster himself, the great philanthropist Iqbal Survé, was to reveal the identity of those behind the X account Goolam (@goolammv). Whoever it is has been responsible for some truly scurrilous posts on social media, including a suggestion that Sisulu and Survé could be romantically linked — although this doesn’t seem possible given that narcissists only ever have eyes for themselves.
Gossip aside, it is Goolam’s other posts, the ones that target those accused of corruption and incompetence in government that have greatly troubled politicians, particularly the advocates of radical economic transformation.
Sisulu, for example, told the briefing that she was a “victim of Goolam”, that the account had derailed her 2017 ANC presidential campaign, along with those of Zweli Mkhize and Nkosazana “The Clarice” Dlamini-Zuma. If this is true, then we all owe Goolam an enormous debt of gratitude; in particular, he, she or they have saved us from the Doek of Death.
But who is or are the elusive Goolam? A number of individuals have over time been identified by Survé’s sock puppets as being part of this secretive cabal. The latest was “outed” at the briefing.
He is university lecturer and part-time comedian Mohammed Yacoob Vawda. He has denied the allegations, which he has described as ridiculous. “This is very weird,” Vawda has said of his “unmasking”. “A lot of things have been circulating about me nationally that I am behind some Twitter account. I don’t even use Twitter.”
Nevertheless, and thanks to the Unmasking Project, he and his family have received death threats. As a result, Vawda has now received several offers of pro bono legal representation, and has now consulted with lawyers.
As for the Unmasking Project, well, it will apparently continue with its work. According to Mahlangu, a series of “exposés” will be published in the coming weeks.
“Among Vawda’s staunchest defenders is [legal analyst] Ismail Abramjee, who, according to the Laudium Sun publication, was a known ally of apartheid president PW Botha,” Mahlangu said.
“This, however, is just the tip of the iceberg. We will, over the course of the next few weeks, unravel the funding mechanisms, institutions, and individuals that form part of this disinformation network.”
The tip of the iceberg? We do hope so. What could be more spectacular than the coming Independent Media shipwreck?
Party funding
How long, we wonder, before the EFF leadership sport orange rather than red overalls? On Tuesday, Afriforum announced it will be filing criminal charges against Julius Malema and his deputy Floyd Shivambu following fresh allegations that they took part in the looting of the VBS Mutual Bank.
Said allegations are meticulously detailed in the 263-page affidavit to the Pretoria High Court from the bank’s former chair, Tshifhiwa Matodzi. To recap:
Claims that Malema and Shivambu benefitted from the R2 billion stolen from the bank first came to light in 2018 following the collapse of VBS. Some R16.1 million of this amount, it’s alleged, was siphoned off to Shivambu’s younger brother, Brian.
Allegations then emerged that Juju used this money to buy designer clobber, splash out on lavish parties and pay for his son’s private school education. My colleague David Bullard’s engaging column this week provides an insight into the lavish Malema lifestyle — one that just doesn’t seem possible on an MP’s salary. However, in October last year, the Parliamentary Ethics Committee ruled that no evidence could be found linking the EFF leader to the missing funds.
Matodzi last week pleaded guilty to 33 counts of corruption, fraud, money laundering and racketeering. His explosive affidavit and confession, part of a deal to “rectify my wrongdoing” and reduce his 495-year prison sentence to 15 years, contains new details about this sordid business.
This information, it must be said, makes it clear that Malema was certainly not alone in receiving a share of the life savings of VBS’s vulnerable depositors. According to Matodzi, VBS paid dozens of bribes to government officials to convince them to place municipal funds with the bank.
It’s worth noting that this scandal was primarily about ANC corruption. The EFF’s share of the spoils was relatively small: a lump sum of R5 million, according to Matodzi, followed by monthly instalments of R1 million. This is chicken feed compared to the hundreds of millions that others stole, and Malema and Shivambu may feel aggrieved that they and — for the time being at least — they alone are the focus of media attention in this rebooted scandal.
There have come the usual protestations of innocence. Juju has said there was nothing new in the allegations, and referred accusers to an earlier response contained in “archives”. He and Shivambu had done nothing wrong, he said, and those who didn’t agree were free to “open a case” — a challenge that, funnily enough, Kallie Kriel and Afriforum have now seen fit to take up.
Even more amusing are former EFF national chairman Dali Mpofu’s euphemisms for the tranches of pensioners’ cash handed over to the terrible two. These were “gratuities”, “payments for services”, “donations”, “gratifications”, “loans”. Not long now, and we’ll be hearing about “loyalty rewards”, “finders-keepers” and “lucky packets”.
As for Matodzi’s claims, well, Mpofu has given them the full bullshit treatment. The Sowetan quoted him as saying:
“Nothing new comes out of that affidavit, nothing at all. If anything, that affidavit contains information which absolves the persons you have liberally said have been fingered. You must separate what [Matodzi] calls a donation, which is what happens to political parties. There is no political party that doesn’t receive donations.
“What is being said is that there is corruption. I said, where is the corruption? Where’s the fraud and where’s the money laundering or any crime? We are tired of having to say the same thing about this. Every time someone speaks, it is blown up as if something new has come up.”
Alas, something new has come up and, on the eve of the EFF’s 11th anniversary celebrations, the tell-tale signs of fraud and corruption are there for all to see.
Fashion notes
It’s music festival season here in the UK, and thousands mass in fields far and wide, there to wallow in the mud for a few days and be blasted witless by whoever’s topping the charts this week.
These gatherings are not however the carefree bacchanals of my youth. Today’s events are tightly managed corporate affairs. Rules and regulations apply and, in keeping with the ethos of the age, certain items are strictly forbidden lest they cause offence. Namely clothing and garments promoting “cultural appropriation”.
A recent report in The Times suggests these could include Native American feather headdresses, Hawaiian puka shell necklaces and “pre-Columbian” ponchos. These, critics say, have been “borrowed” from cultures “without understanding of or respect for their significance”.
Consider the humble sombrero. One would have supposed a wide-brimmed hat essential for outdoor revelry as protection against the sun — it seems unlikely but there could, in fact, be one or two sunny days between now and September — but no, the sombrero represents an ethnic stereotype and is an insulting reduction of Mexican culture. That staple of English summer millinery, the plain white handkerchief with knotted corners, is probably best at avoiding offence if not possible sunstroke (we should be so lucky). Union Jack snot rags are however a no-no, given their association with rightwing nationalism.
Elephant-print harem trousers are also greatly misunderstood. According to Hippie Pants, an online source that is an authority in these matters, these comfy and versatile items celebrate a “cross-cultural exchange and the global wanderlust spirit”. That may be so but to the modern cultural warrior they are also plainly racist and sexist.
For starters, the elephant motif has spiritual connotations in Thailand and it is so not on that we dabble in the woo woo of other cultures. Those of us with long memories recall the “Satanic Breasts” controversy of 1994 when supermodel Claudia Schiffer was sent down a Parisian runway in a bustier embroidered with a passage from the Koran in Arabic script. The affair threatened Chanel's exports to the Muslim world after it was slammed as insulting Islam. The fashion house hastily pulled the range and issued a grovelling apology.
Then there’s the claim that harem pants are an imperialist derivative of the salvar, the traditional baggy Turkish trousers which are gathered in tightly at the ankle, and stem directly from an orientalist sexualisation of Middle Eastern and Asian attire. While harems or seraglios blossomed in the 19th century Western imagination as exotic, erotically charged venues, they are now regarded as places where women are imprisoned and kept as sex slaves. One can easily understand then how these voluminous garments can be triggering.
One sure and simple method of navigating this minefield of sensitivities, the regulars at the Slaughtered Lamb (“Finest Ales & Pies”) have suggested, is to strip off and dance naked. After all, it’s what hippies did at Woodstock in 1969.
The worst that could be said of such exhibitionism is that it doesn’t look good on ageing groovers — too flappy by half — but at least no cultures will be harmed or appropriated in so doing.
